The Light at the End of the Tunnel: Electra Shepard's POV
by mercs4life
Summary: This is during ME3: Citadel DLC, the morning after the energetic party. This is part one, from my Shepard's POV, and part two is the same story, but from Garrus' POV.
1. Chapter 1

Warm, golden light spilled into Electra Shepard's room through the sheer white curtains. It caressed her cheek and tugged at her eyelids until she finally opened them.

Maybe Garrus was right, she thought to herself, a little irritated. Maybe these windows are too big.

It wasn't often that she could take breaks from her efforts to face the Reapers without immense guilt - how could she allow herself to sleep in on a warm morning, in a safe apartment, away from all the chaos when there are thousands, if not millions, of individuals dying every second? But she's forced herself to push down the guilt; she couldn't do anything until the Normandy was thoroughly searched and cleaned after being stolen, and shes rallied as many species against the Reapers as she possibly could. All that was left was to wait.

There were a few things - people, really - that made the wait bearable, even made her secretly ache for more shore leave. One of them was lying in bed next to her.

He was staring at the ceiling with an oddly serious expression on his face for someone who had promised to enjoy this time with her. A part of her didn't mind; the golden light made his rough, scaled face shine beautifully, and the stoic expression seemed to simply bring the image together.

"Garrus?," she murmured, hating her soft voice right after she wakes up. "Is something wrong?"

He seemed a bit startled at the question. "Shepard. Of course not." He broke his concentration on the ceiling to examine her face, drink in the her sleepy expression, then turned back to the ceiling, seemingly lost in his thoughts again that quickly.

She wanted to ask what he was thinking about, to pick apart his mind and figure out what was so important that it would plague his mind in these early hours. But she waited, knowing Garrus would tell her when he was ready.

"Okay," she replied simply, and inched under the covers closer to him until she was curled next to his side with her head on his shoulder. He absentminded stroked her cheek and ran his talons through her very short, very soft, curly hair. She closed her eyes and sighed, pleased. She never told him how much she loved it, but he seemed to have figured it out on his own. Or, perhaps he loves doing this just as much.

A few minutes like this passed in silence, Shepard enjoying her turian boyfriend's presence as he lost himself in his own thoughts.

Then, he spoke.

"You know, Shepard...," he began, his deep voice rumbling in his chest. She could feel the vibrations travel through her. She enjoyed that as well. "Eventually... The war against the Reapers will be over."

"Mhm," she agreed while nodding into his shoulder. Garrus was never the direct type.

"Assuming with both survive this thing... I was wondering. I've actually been thinking about this for a while, so don't laugh."

"I won't," she promised.

"I was wondering," he repeated, a little more nervous now. "How does, uh, Shepard Vakarian sound?"

'Shepard Vakarian'?, she mused to herself. How would that work? Shepard's not even my first name. What a weird way to propose -

She stopped. She bolted upright, the covers falling off of her, confusion and shock plain on her face as she stared at her nervous boyfriend. She hadn't even noticed that he had turned on his side while he was talking. He looked nervous and a bit scared at her reaction, like he thought she'd jump out the bed, board the Normandy, and never look back.

"Did you just... Propose?," she inquired plainly, feeling more than a little slow. Duh, he proposed. Was that the norm for turians? Is that how Garrus's father proposed to his mother? Come to think of it, she didn't really know anything about his immediate family. Strange.

She snapped out of her reverie once she realized Garrus was speaking.

"... knew I should have asked Joker for some vids about human customs on proposing. Look, Shepard, I didn't mean to be rude or anything, I just -"

She covered his mouth gently, until he stopped talking. She smiled, removed her hand, and kissed him softly on his lips.

"Of course I'll marry you, you dork," she answered affectionately. She never even considered she was important enough to lose sleep over, not until she heard Anderson's recordings after accepting the apartment. But of course Garrus would remind her. No wonder she was in love with him.

He looked relieved - even more so than she would have thought - sat up, and touched his forehead to hers.

"You have no idea what this means to me, Shepard," he whispered.

She smiled. Then, remembering something important, she lifted her head and tilted his chin so they made eye contact.

"I'm still accepting your proposal, Garrus, but you need to know something," she began a bit sternly. "My first name isn't Shepard."

The elated expression dropped quickly and he began apologizing profusely. She smiled and shook her head fondly, as she always did when her awkward turian boyfriend makes a social mistake.

But something began to tug at the back of her mind. Something she always pushed down, more often than having to choose between Kaiden and Ashley, more intensely than thinking about the pain of dying and being brought back to life. Something that never truly surfaced because she never had enough downtime since the incident.

But now all she could think about was the faces of her parents, family, and friends she lost on Mindoir. All she could hear was their cheerful voices calling her name, laughing with her and sometimes at her because of her clumsy mistakes, and for the first time in a very long time, she allowed herself to feel homesick.


	2. Light at the End of the Tunnel: Garrus

Despite the dark, the comfortable bedding, and silence - excluding his girlfriend's quiet breathing - Garrus Vakarian could not sleep.

The dark was very welcomed after the drinking and excited energy of the party the night before. Although the... _energy_ exerted by his girlfriend after the party... was completely worth dealing with the drunken escapades of his crew. Admittedly, plotting to bomb Shepard's apartment with Zaeed - for her protection, not his entertainment, of course - when the party got quiet was quite... amusing as well.

Shepard's bed was easily the softest, most comfortable thing he has ever laid in. The guilt he felt for enjoying this night while his father and sister ran from Reapers, and Palaven burned would have been overwhelming - what kind of turian was he? - but he promised his girlfriend he would enjoy the shore leave with her, and how could he refuse a direct order from his commander?

But the silence... The silence gave him time to reflect. He leaned against the headboard and stared out of the window. He couldn't wait to explore the stars with Shepard. After Saren and the Collectors, and now this war, they've more than earned retiring to a tropical island on a near empty planet together for a few years.

Or, maybe - probably more likely - they would spend a few decades rebuilding Palaven and Earth. Maybe he could take her to Palaven and she could meet his father and sister. Or she take him to Earth - to the best of his knowledge, she hasn't been there that often - and they could experience it together.

Maybe he'd even gather up the courage to ask her to take him to Mindoir - it isn't a completely outrageous idea - and he could see where she lived. He was sure she never went back there after she left, even though it has been rebuilt. He'd always wondered why but was unsure if this was a topic he should bring up with her. She has a hundred other things to deal with... He'd have to be patient and wait for her to tell him.

No matter what path he thought they would take, she was always with him, and he was always with her. It was simply what was going to happen; there isn't a force in the universe that could change that fact. Shepard and Vakarian...

He sighed and slid into the bed. Shepard moaned lowly and turned towards him in her sleep. He laid on his side and watched her for a moment. It was easy to forget Shepard was terrifying, what with her ridiculously soft human fringe - hair, he thought she called it - and smooth, tan skin, and her peaceful, serene expression as she slept; it was easy to forget that she'd headbutted a krogan and saved the galaxy twice already. He chuckled softly and ran his talons through her fring- uh, hair.

Spirits, how he loved her. What wouldn't he do for her? She groaned and he smiled. Maybe he'd let her sleep.

Sometime during his speculation of their future, the room became lit with gold. Shepard's face gleamed and gold sparkles danced around her dark brown hair.

He turned to the ceiling. Could he really expect a life with her? Did he truly deserve her? She could find someone closer to home, someone better for her-

"Garrus?" Shepard suddenly woke up. Oh no, did he wake her? "Is something wrong?"

He turned to her, a bit surprised to be pulled out of his reverie. He didn't think it was that late; he'd hoped she'd sleep more. "Shepard. Of course not." There was nothing he didn't love about the view in front of him; Shepard's tan skin accented by the golden light, her stormy blue-gray eyes fluttering sleepily. If only they could stay like this forever. He faced the ceiling again.

"Okay," she responded patiently, and curled up against him. With her head on his shoulder, he could play with her hair easily, which he did and continued to do through the silence.

No matter what, he envisioned them together after this war. They both survive, and they would choose to stick with one another until they die. Does she feel the same? Is it realistic to think - to even hope - that she would?

"You know, Shepard..." His mandibles twitched anxiously, and he was briefly glad she couldn't see his face from that vantage point. "Eventually... The war against the Reapers will be over."

"Mhm," she concurred. He loved how patient she always was with him.

"Assuming with both survive this thing... I was wondering. I've actually been thinking about this for a while, so don't laugh."

"I won't," she promised. Did she sound slightly amused?

"I was wondering," he continued, audibly nervous. "How does, uh, Shepard Vakarian sound?"

She didn't respond immediately. Did she understand the question? Is there some sort of ritual humans perform to get their proposal across? Dammit, why didn't he talk to Joker at the party-

Suddenly, she sat upright, covers falling off her chest and onto the bed, revealing her black bra and briefly distracting him.

"Did you just... propose?," she asked incredulously, striking fear into Garrus' heart. Of course he would mess this one up, the single most important question he could possibly ask her ever.

"Did I say something wrong? Dammit, I knew I should have asked Joker for some vids about human customs on proposing. Look, Shepard, I didn't mean to be rude or anything, I just-"

She reached down and - mercifully - covered his mouth. Then she smiled, his favorite smile in the universe, and kissed him softly.

Shepard's smile - her real one, not the one she gives to politicians - is the greatest gift he could ever receive from her. It wasn't until he found himself brainstorming ways to see that smile that he realized he was in love with her. It happened a few week after suggesting to test his reach and her flexibility - he had made a mistake, he couldn't remember what by now, but it was something simple, probably a bad pun or a metaphor gone wrong, and he looked up at her face instead of turning away. There was the warmest, brightest smile he'd ever seen, glued to his commander's face. That smile said "I've finally found a home" and he was a part of that home. He couldn't get it out of his head for weeks, even dreamed about it on more than one occasion.

"Of course I'll marry you, you dork," she answered affectionately. His heart soared. What could possibly be better than this moment? Defeating the Reapers, sure. Rebuilding Earth and Palaven, of course. But right now, this was the most important thing that has ever happened to him.

He brought his forehead to hers. "You have no idea what this means to me, Shepard."

She truly didn't. Maybe he did deserve her. She certainly seemed to believe he did. She wanted to spend whatever life she has after the war with him. Maybe she didn't need someone closer to home -

Shepard brought his face up to hers. "I'm still accepting your proposal, Garrus, but you need to know something," she stated sternly, with a vague hint of general concern. "My first name isn't Shepard."

Of fucking course.

He began apologizing - after all, literally everyone they know call her Shepard, why doesn't anyone know her first name? - and at first she just smiled warmly and shook her head as usual, but this time, her face darkened. He'd never seen this happen before, ever, and allowed himself to trail off. He wanted to snap her out of it, to grab her by the shoulders and shake her out of it. He wanted her to look at him and tell him all of her worries and problems, and not to worry about the fact he's at least 3 years her junior, he can take care of her as well.

But he knew, deep down, that this wasn't something he could just snap her out of. He'd just have to accept that the only thing he might be able to do is simply embrace her and make sure she knows that he won't let go if she doesn't want him to.


End file.
